Soul Surrender
by Starry-NightsXIII
Summary: Riku loved Sora. Sora just...didn't love him back. Riku never dealt with grief well...Songfic, song: Expired in Goreville by Chiodos. Unrequited RikuxSora, SoraxKairi, character suicide. R&R please and thank you.


_Songfic_

_Rated T for very brief language, mature themes, and suicide_

_**Note to the readers of my HP fics**__: I AM planning to finish the two, but life has been very hectic for me. I haven't had time to write, save for little one shots and stuff, so please don't be too sore with me! I love you all and hope you'll be patient with me! _

_**Note: When bold and italics overlap in the story, it is because that particular lyric is also part of the actual story text. **_

_This is my first Kingdom Hearts fic and I hope you enjoy it :3_

**UPDATE: As of the 15****th**** of October, 2007, this fic has been updated. Nothing big at all, just a few minor changes to the text that had been bothering me, so if you read this fic back in May when it was first published, don't worry, you're not missing anything! **

**PS I am currently working on many different Kingdom Hearts fics and one Harry Potter fic. What sucks is for my HP one, it was near completion, but when I went to update my laptop in September, my stupid school neglected to inform me that they'd be wiping my entire hard drive clean of everything, so my almost completed, multi-chapter Harry/Draco slash fic went POOF! Life really knows how to stick it in and break it off, yeah? Oh, well, I guess a rewrite is in order! Anyway, so they're all still in their baby stages, but hopefully I'll post something soon. I hope you'll check them out once they're up!**

**I am also considering a sequel to this fic since it has been requested, but I'm not sure if I'm actually going to do it. We shall see! Thanks, pretties! **

_- Duckie _

**Disclaimer: **I do NOT own Kingdom Hearts or any of Chiodos's awesome songs (though I wish I did)

**(--)**

**Soul Surrender**

Half awake in the fading twilight, a handsome youth, by the name of Riku, lay sprawled on the warmth of feathery-soft sand that only graced the shores of the Destiny Islands.

Though the seventeen year old had resided on the tropical island for quite sometime, his snow-water hair and wintertide eyes marked him as a child of winter. This uniquely featured boy had been laying on his back since the early afternoon, located on the off-coast, diminutive spit of land that was linked to the much larger island by a makeshift bridge.

And since that early afternoon, he had been thinking angry and malevolent thoughts of his two best friends.

_It's dropping to the terrain at my feet_

_Palm trees are my only company_

Riku stared bitterly up at the slowly swaying palm trees touching the darkening sky above him. Apart from his dark days two years ago, he had never felt more alone.

He had always known that his two closest friends, Sora and Kairi, shared more-than-friends feelings for each other, but Riku had been so sure that he could change that. After all, he loved Sora so much, and that should've been enough. Apparently it wasn't…

"Fuck…" Riku spat from under his breath, jerking himself up from his position on the ground.

Everything had been perfect before Kairi. It had always been he and Sora: the dynamic duo, the gruesome twosome, best friends to the end. Sora, being a year younger, had always put Riku up on a pedestal when they were young, worshipping him like a god, wanting to be just like him. He would copy his every move and try to imitate every aspect of the older boy. When they became older, Sora and Riku tried to best each other in everything: from who could hold their breath underwater longest to sparring matches. Their friendly competition had brought them closer together and began to change the way Riku perceived his feelings toward Sora.

And then along came Kairi.

All of sudden, Sora began to direct his attentions towards her and spent more time with this member of the fairer sex than he did with Riku.

As soon as Kairi had set foot on the island, a stake had been driven between Sora and Riku, creating a fissure in the foundation of their friendship, widening over time until it became the cold chasm that separated them today.

Thinking of that repulsive fact caused Riku to clench his fists in a rage of cold fire that caused his arms to twitch spasmodically. Without warning, Riku viciously launched one of the many bottles of a liquor he had been drowning his sorrows in, at a tree. He watched it shatter with little satisfaction as the shards caught the light of the setting sun in opalescent glints. He was preparing to propel another bottle when the echoing melody of laughter reached his ears. Riku, irritated by the despicable gaiety, turned to acknowledge its source with abhorring eyes. He instantly regretted his action as soon as he took in the scene before him.

_On this beach, star crossed lovers obsess_

_Alluring dreams of touching starry skies_

_(I'll love you until my last breath)_

In the not so far-off distance, Sora and Kairi were walking hand in hand along the shore of the lower beach, letting the gurgling water lap gently at their feet and ankles.

_Each speck of sand falls in each footstep along the shore_

_As every tide rolls in, everyone takes its toll_

Riku watched with an acid gaze as the footprints they left behind freeze-framed their romantic progress, mocking him silently.

_The salt in this water is nauseating_

_Keeping me trapped and running in circles_

As the pair shared a lingering kiss, Riku suddenly began to feel sick. The sharp scent of the sea the cry of the gulls, and just about everything around him, that he had grown up loving, turned his legs to fragile glass and his insides to rot. A certain desperation snaked through his veins and spread throughout his body.

He couldn't take it. He loved Sora so much, but the brown-haired fool was to blind to see it. Every time Riku attempted to profess his love to Sora, the words either got hopelessly lost in his throat or tripped and fell to pieces on their way out of his mouth. So many signs and so many chances, but Riku's ineloquence and Sora's insensibility had cost him.

_On this beach, star-crossed lovers obsess_

_Alluring dreams of touching starry skies_

It took a moment for Riku to realize that he was silently weeping. Tiny, warm tears of despair.

Wiping the tears away in frustration, Riku allowed himself one last look at his lost love, thinking of all that could be, should be, but never would be.

The brunette and his red-haired lady love were pointing up towards the sky, which had taken on an indigo hue and boasted a bespattering of stars. Riku would've thought the eternal number of tea-light spheres were beautiful, if it weren't for the misery that veiled his being.

The couple continued to gaze heavenward as they started off the beach, fingers laced, and made a beeline for the Secret Place.

It then became too much for Riku, for he knew what was to happen.

Earlier that day, Riku had overheard two giggling girls gossiping about how Sora planned to share a Papou fruit with Kairi. Riku never believed in the Papou legend, but he knew Sora did. If Sora believed in it enough to want to share it with Kairi, then there was just no chance for Riku's heart.

It wasn't fair, Riku loved Sora so much. He'd give his life for him.

And then the answer overtook him like a sinister shadow. He'd show Sora just how much he loved him. He'd give Sora the one thing that he could never give back.

_A quick glance over my shoulder reveals a number only seen in the movies_

Choking back desperate sobs for what he was going to do, Riku collapsed to the ground, amidst the shattered glass. He paid no heed to the crimson tears that his skin wept forth as the splintered glass pierced him. He felt nothing. He _had _nothing. If he didn't have Sora, what else was there to live for?

A dark decision settled like a burial shroud upon his mind and Riku slowly pulled a small notepad and pen from his back pocket, shakily writing out his fate.

_Shards of glass and a decayed piece of parchment half buried…_

_Half buried…that reads:_

_**You cured me of my foolish obsession with love**_

_**I'll love you until my last breath takes you from me**_

Riku tore the tear-spattered message from the pad and buried half of it in the sand. He didn't want it to blow away. He wanted Sora to know exactly what he had done to him…and what he was about to do to himself.

Rising in silence from the ground, Riku bit his lip and walked to the edge of the little islet, preparing to play out his tragedy.

Looking down into the deceptively calm water, Riku estimated that the fall itself wouldn't kill him. The jagged rocks, however, would.

From the mildly swishing waves, two great stones rose, worn and sharpened at the upper ends, resembling the huge, corroding fangs of some rabid beast, the white, sea foam frothing about them. Below the surface, dozens upon dozens of smaller, razor-sharp rocks stood ominously like decayed teeth, flanking the pair of huge stones. It was a certain death to anyone that fell to it. The perfect ending to an imperfect life.

He had lost Sora, now Sora would lose him. Riku's face was an emotionless mask as he turned to face the Destiny Islands for the final time, but the torment raging in his feline eyes like a roiling maelstrom told a story of sorrow.

With his back now seaward, Riku faced his home. The island was dark and quiet now, families having retired to their homes for dinner, and the only sounds Riku could discern in the silence was the lull of seawater songs and the palpitations of his own heart.

There was no turning back now. This was it. His final destination.

Heels to the edge, Riku raised his arms up and out to his sides, closing his eyes; his sacrificial stance resembled that of a man upon a crucifix. Draining his mind of everything, Riku dredged up a single, angelic image of a certain blue-eyed brunette. The final image he wished to see.

Riku smiled a sad one before putting all his weight backwards and allowing his feet to leave the ground.

And for one short moment, it was nothing but pure, cascading emptiness as he fell, devoid of everything, save for the pull of gravity and the surge of the sea. An earthbound Purgatory.

Unfortunately, Hell wasn't far off.

With a sickening crack, Riku felt his neck snap and his skull shatter as stone and bone met. His spine rearranged itself nauseatingly, and blistering rushes of agony tore viciously through his mutilated body.

The sharper of the two giant stones protruded nastily through his chest, impaling him. Bent and twisted ribs revealed themselves in a sickening fashion through shuddering stretches of muscle and sinew, exposing his weakening heart.

Hot blood pulsated from his split skull, trickling and pooling in his eyes, turning black thoughts to red. His mind was slowly being filled with black smog, marring his mental vision like the blurred edges of a ruined photograph.

But one image still lingered clearly. An image that possessed lapis lazuli eyes to steal the hearts of angels and a smile to make the gods blush.

"Sora…" was the last thing Riku managed in a hoarse whisper. That name and his last breath (a haunting death rattle) fluttered deftly from his blood-stained lips as crimson red merged with azure waves and Riku surrendered his soul to the ultimate oblivion.

_**The End**_

_The song used for this fic was "Expired in Goreville" by the amazing Chiodos. Read and review please! I'd love to know what you think! _

_- Duckie_


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